Venturing out to make friends; trying is a good step.

Saturday mornings with everyone home are a treat.

We tackle all our weekend chores and then we pile into the handy dandy ‘familyvan” and head out into the day.

With four busy boys we tend to spend a lot of our free time at the park. We’ve found a really fantastic parent A ND kid friendly water/play park with an abundance of greenery (seriously lots of running about space FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR from the road a real find these days) and we decided that with the mercury hitting 38+ we’d be happiest someplace wet and cool.

Once we get to the park we are happy to see that there are a few other families there that had the same idea as us.

There is a really fun Dad who is gallivanting about the water park with his two little girls, growling and giggling, swinging and swooping through the sprinklers. His wife smiles on from the bench.

My boys run about, splashing and laughing and then after adequately getting wet and cool Lincoln races off to the play park 20 feet opposite the water park. He climbs with another little boy who is close in age and follows him about the park in appreciation of the boys agility as he climbs and jumps and runs.

When the freckled faced little boy settles into a rocking horse Lincoln moves in and announces “Hi, I’m Lincoln! Who are you?”

THe boy answers “what?”

“Hi, I’m Lincoln! Who are you?””


“Hi, I’m Lincoln! Who are you?”


And this continues on for a minute or so.

I sip my latte and ponder.

I sip again. And watch the moment unfold.

What a little jerk. I think. Has to be mean to the “slightly odd, kid”. Oh well, it will happen. Linc can deal with it.

*sip* swallow.

Then, I understood.

The family that was playing in the waterpark spoke another language, and I was fairly confident no one spoke any English. Not that it really mattered. They were happy and smiley, the kids giggled and grinned and the parents seemed  kindly and energetic. That is all I cared about.

Now that my Son had ventured out to introduce himself and try to make a “friend” I needed to consider things a bit more.

In my mind I  QUICKLY LINKED UP the kids  in the park to the parents in the park and could see the boy did not belong to any of the other parents so he  likely belonged to the non-english speaking ones.

He must not understand what Lincoln was saying.

Lincoln was starting to get a little annoyed. His voice stayed friendly and inviting but he moved closer and stuck a hand on his hip (Mom style, totally.)

Eventually the two seemed to get that talking wasn’t going to work and they ran off to enjoy kidhood the way kids do best. Climbing, Sliding, jumping, bouncing. No words required.

Maybe it is because I am a mother of an ASD kid but it seemed like Lincoln knew in his envornment this kid was the most like him. No, he likely was ASD too but he did have a social impairment. He couldn’t communicate!

He did belong to the family and I never heard a single English word the whole visit though their smiles were plentifully flashed at all (including me)

I have noticed that at school, a little boy that is very likely ASD too seemed to gravitate to LIncoln and tries relentlessly to be his buddy. Instead of talking to him he screams at him and pulls on his clothing. Lincoln asks me constantly why he “screams at me? it scares me” I knew the answer but instead I told LIncoln to ask the boy.

“He probably wants a friend, and is picking you” I note. Hoping my son feels compassion and wants to be a friend to him, so he is not alone in the play yard.

I won’t ever know the why of it but I am sure happy to see my boy desiring friendship and even putting himself out there.

Friends are the best thing life offers, well besides kids 🙂

SO, do kids on the spectrum know or attract each other?

Do they seem to understand their needs? OR are they just happy to make a friend and do not segregate others based on looks, nationality and ability?

Interesting ponder.

(over a latte..giggle)


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